And now, for your viewing pleasure, "Man Falls Off Bike"

Alternate Title: Hello, I'm Dumb-Ass

Background:
When I first got my "clipless pedals", I became a real cyclist. Someone told me there were 2 types of real cyclists:

1) Those who have fallen over.
2) Those who have not fallen over yet.

For nearly 5 months, I've been fall-free.

The Setup:
There's this guy in our office who can track stand for an eternity. A "track stand" is where you balance on your bike, feet on the pedals, without going anywhere. I've been practicing all summer. I'm not bad.

Insert Comedy Routine:
Last night, I hit a red light, and instinctively, I started the track stand dance. 30 seconds... 40 seconds... "Hey look at me! I'm Cool" my ego shouted to the 4 lanes of traffic that were stopped beside me.

50 seconds... I was watching the light for the opposite side of the traffic -- it turned red. I knew I had 2 seconds, and then I'd have green... I forgot that the oncoming traffic had an advanced green. My light stayed red. I began to wobble.

Cue slow-motion sound-effects of guy realizing his world is about to come crashing down in 3...2...1... (boom!)